Ep. 19 It's Not About You: How To Stop Spiraling Every Time A Lead Doesn't Hire You
You know that pit-in-your-stomach feeling you get when a dream client says no or worse, ghosts your proposal completely? It's hard not to take those things seriously. But one mindset shift changed everything for me, and it starts with a quote I came across years ago:
“If someone is paying for your services, they’re not investing in you as a person. They’re investing in their own business.”
I wish I could properly credit the original source of that quote, but it’s stuck with me ever since. It completely reframed the way I thought about sales, rejection, and self-worth in business. So in this post, we’re going to break down what that quote really means and how to stop taking client decisions personally so you can run your business with more confidence and resilience.
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Rejection Isn’t a Reflection of Your Worth
For a long time, every no felt like a gut punch. If someone didn’t book I assumed it was because I wasn’t talented, strategic, experienced, or likable enough. I made their decision mean something about me. If that sounds familiar, you’re not alone.
But here’s the truth: when someone hires you, it’s not about validating you as a person. It’s about solving a problem in their business. And if they don’t move forward, it usually has nothing to do with you at all. It’s about their goals, priorities, timing, or budget.
Your Services Are an Investment, Not a Favor
Your potential clients aren’t thinking about how much they like you as a human. They’re asking themselves things like:
Does this solve the right problem for me?
Do I trust this person to deliver?
Will I get a solid return on investment (ROI)?
Does it fit my budget?
Is this the right time to make this move?
It’s all about ROI, alignment, and timing. And yes, sometimes people don’t move forward because “it doesn’t feel like the right fit.” That’s okay too. We want the right clients to say yes and the wrong ones to self-select out, which is where having a solid brand strategy comes in!
How to Build Confidence That Converts
If you're constantly overthinking every little detail from your pricing to your Instagram posts to your Zoom appearance…it’s time to let that go. Your job is not to perform or be constantly seeking validation. It’s to show up confidently, communicate clearly, and be a trustworthy business partner.
Confidence shows up in how you communicate your offers, how you set and hold boundaries around pricing, how you lead your clients through your process, and how your brand reflects the true value you bring to the table. These pieces work together to help prospective clients see you as a safe investment. As someone they can trust to help them solve a real problem.
You're not being “too much” when you own your expertise. You’re making it easier for the right clients to trust you.
When You Take It Personally, You Lose Objectivity
When you attach your self-worth to your sales, every no feels like a personal rejection. And that’s a fast track to burnout. You start second-guessing everything, procrastinating, and making impulsive business decisions (like signing up for random programs or hiring coaches you don’t really need) just to feel better.
Instead, stay grounded in the value you offer. Not everyone is going to hire you. And that’s a good thing. The more you can separate your identity from your sales, the more empowered you’ll feel to run your business with clarity and calm.
Would You Hire You?
Here’s a question I ask myself all the time: would I invest in my own business, based on the way I’m currently showing up? Am I demonstrating confidence, clarity, and leadership? Am I making it easy for someone to say, “Yes, this is the right person to help me”?
You don’t need to fake it but you do need to trust yourself. Celebrate your wins. Talk about the results you get for clients. Your brand should reflect your highlight your value and what makes you the best option to help your clients.
A strategically branded experience doesn’t just attract aligned clients. It also repels the ones who aren’t a fit, which is a good thing. It’s what allows you to lead from a grounded, confident place instead of getting stuck in desperation mode.
What Actually Matters in Business
As a designer, I care deeply about visuals, brand presence, and online experience. But at the end of the day, the only thing that really matters is this: can you get someone results?
Not how perfect your social feed is. Not whether someone liked your post about your dog. Not whether your hair was on point during your Zoom call. Results are what build trust. Results are what build referrals. Results are what create a sustainable, six-figure business.
So stop obsessing over who isn’t hiring you and start focusing on delivering incredible results to the people who did.
It’s Not About You…Really!
When someone chooses to work with you, they’re not investing in you. They’re investing in their own business.
Yes, they’re giving you money. But they’re doing it because they believe you can help them get where they want to go. That’s the energy you want to lean into. You don’t have to be perfect. You just have to solve the right problem for the right person, at the right time.
You are worth investing in. But more importantly, your client needs to believe their business is worth investing in. And when they do? They’ll find the person who can help them get there. And hopefully that’s you!
So if you needed a little mindset reset today, I hope this episode helped you feel a little more grounded and a little less in your head. And if it did, send it to your business bestie who might need the same reminder.
🔗 Links & Resources Mentioned In The Episode:
➡️ Follow me on Instagram @spechtand.co
➡️ Book A Discovery Call With Morgan
➡️ Learn more about The Six Figure Brand Society
➡️ Book Your Free 5min Brand Audit
➡️ Blog Post: How I Created a Quiz Lead Magnet in Under a Day Using Interact
🎧 Listen to episode 19 of The Six Figure Brand Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Amazon Music, and YouTube
